My husband and I made a sex menu – and now we are both more satisfied
If there is one thing that I learned in my marriage for almost five years, it is a healthy and happy sex life to make a more satisfying and satisfied relationship. Maybe it’s a hot opinion-I don’t say that sex is the end, all the romantic relationship-but my personal experience is that satisfying sex life goes along with the developing emotional dynamics. And believe me when I said that my husband and I did not always have a sex life that I gossip during Saturday lunch with girls.
Even though we need time and patience to get to a place where we are both happy with our sexual relations, we can now communicate honestly and without an assessment of the sex acts that we are interested in to try. Even though we keep the discussion open enough, I am always interested in the new way we can deliberately check each other. That’s why I really want to make a sex menu when I hear about this exercise.
What exactly is the sex menu, you ask? This is easier than you think and has nothing to do with restaurants – unless public sex is not attractive to you. Read on to learn about sex menus, its benefits, how to make it, and more.
What is a sex menu?
Simply put, the sex menu is a list of sexual activity that you want to try with your partner. Sex menu often includes foreplay “appetizers,” such as hugs, sensual massage, and sexing, as well as “dishes”, such as fingers, oral sex, vaginal sex, and anal sex. Playing roles, edges, dirty talk, and sex toys can also be included in the sex menu as “side.” And of course, you must have a “dessert,” like bathing together, naps, or activities after other treatments.
Emily Morse, Sex Educator and Host Sex with emilyThe longest sex podcast in history, said your sex menu should not be divided into several parts. This can be a list of everything that you interested in trying (or outside) the bedroom. Either way, making a sex menu must empower you and your partner to talk about your desires, determine what you will try, and even find new sexual experiences together. The idea is that each of you makes your own, and then you compare it and decide what you want to try.
What are the benefits of sex menu?
It encourages communication
Talking about sex can be difficult! It is common to feel nervous or self -aware when trying to express sexual desires to others, so that sex menus can be a good way to make open communication channels. With the two couples created and shared their sex menus, they were vulnerable and honest about their desires, and that encourage the same basis for conversations that were free of assessment.
This helps you identify your partner’s preferences
Whether you are in a new relationship or you feel interrupted with a long -term partner, making a sex menu can help you sexually connect. This is a conversation starter and “sexual road map,” as Morse said, it will help determine which activities are interested in and which are forbidden.
This helps you find new desires
Sex is not just about penetration – there are many activities under the umbrella! With that, Don’t feel ashamed if your partner refers to sex on their menu that you have never heard of, or vice versa. That’s part of the point of making sex menus in the first place: To find new desires and further enrich your sex life. So, add whatever you are interested in – you never know what will be your new favorite experience.
It keeps your sex life fresh
In addition to creating a safe space for open and honest discourse, the sex menu also offers an activity checklist for you and your partner to complete. Every time you want to have sex, you can refer to your sex menu and choose the activities you want to do together, which is a fantastic way to refresh things in the bedroom. This is like a couple’s game where you can turn the card reverse to determine what you have to do on a dating night, but you have adjusted your own activities.
What happens when I make a sex menu with my partner
My husband and I have been together for almost a decade, and while we experienced many ups and downs in our sex life for many years, we now have a very open communication channel when it comes to express our sexual interests and preferences. Which says, creating and sharing our individual sex menus is more a small activity that is fun for us, but I can really see how the exercise will be very helpful for couples who do not have communication paths when having sex.
“Making and comparing sex menus is a good way to touch the base about our sexual satisfaction in a more interesting and unattractive way.”
We mostly have the same thing in our list, but this exercise also helps review the actions we want to follow more often. For example, I want to make out with my husband more as a warm -up action, and he wants to accept more oral sex. (A man who wants more work work? Revolutionary, I know.)
Making and comparing sex menus is a good way to touch the base about our sexual satisfaction in a more interesting and unattractive way than just having a conversation. Plus, happy to have our list in front of us as a visual addition for discussion. Although sex menu exercises may initially look the most ideal for new couples, I find it as a constructive activity that is useful as someone in long -term relationships too.
How to implement a sex menu
If you feel like you and your partner are not in the same page sexually, or you never talk about your sexual desires, or you just want to check -in and see if there is something you want to add to your sex life, making a sex menu together -the same can be very helpful to overcome this problem.
Do you choose to make a short bullet list or make a full sex menu completely up to you, your partner, and the level of comfort with you. Remember to be careful that what you think of warming up, your partner may consider the main actions, and vice versa. Not right or wrong, so maintaining open minds and free assessment dialogue is very important.
If your partner is not sure what certain activities are in your list, explain what they need and how you imagine you both participate in these activities. Some items may be difficult, but for others you are on the fence, discussing whether there is a way to work according to activity from time to time. With that, here are some ideas to be added to the sex menu:
Opening (foreplay)
- Mingle
- Dry bend
- Kissing/making out
- Sensual massage
- Sexting
- Watch porn movies
- Listen to Audio Erotica
- Taking a bath together
- Watching each other take care of clothes
Opening Food (Main Law)
- Anal sex
- Fingering
- Reciprocal masturbation
- Oral sex
- Vaginal sex
- 69-ing
Side (Tension, Toys, & Engineering)
- Sex toys
- Slavery
- Sexy playlist
- Temperature game
- Play nipples
- Play role
- Edge
- Praised
- Neck kiss
- Attractive hair
- Dirty conversation
- Shallow
AFTERCARE FOOD
- Clean your partner with a warm towel
- Mingle
- Play with your partner’s hair
- Rub your partner’s back
- Bathing foam or bathing together
- Nap
- Pillow
- Watching movies
- Order food
- Nightcap
- Round two
Alyssa Davis, the author who contributed
Alyssa Davis is a freelance writer who specializes in home content, lifestyle, beauty, and entertainment. He studied English at Indiana University and since then producing articles for publications including Sheknows, Architectural Digest, and Well+Good, for several names.
My husband and my husband made a sex menu – and now we are both more satisfied to appear first at Everygirl.
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